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Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Monsters I Will Use Until I Die

I know I've taken three posts up with complaints about really stupid monsters that Wizards of the Coast used for the 3.5 edition of Dungeons and Dragons.  But there are a lot of monsters that I do enjoy using, and usually I end up using them over and over because I just love them so damn much.

I'm going to list them here now...they aren't in a particular order other then alphabetical.  Though there are a few select favorites that I'll be putting in the next post after this one.  Now, I limited myself to just the first Monster Manual.  Not that there aren't any monsters that I love from the other books, I just have had the first one the longest and, damn it, most of the best are in it.  Also, I left out a lot of the really low CR monsters (such as goblins or kobolds) not because I don't use them, but just because you are kind of forced to use them at low levels.  And I do love me some goblins and just doesn't fit with the theme I was going for.

So here we go, my favorite monsters from Dungeons and Dragons 3.5 Edition!


Ah, the Basilisk.  I enjoy it mostly because of its stone gaze, but also just because it is so fun to throw at your players.  I also love them because they are just so damn lazy.  Seriously, it says in the manual that if you run away, they will only barely try to follow after you.  It's awesome that this creatures whole existence is basically sitting in its lair and turning trespassers into stone for food just so it doesn't need to ever leave its home.  Cause that's what I would be if I was a monster.


 The Bulette is another one of those monsters that are just too much fun to throw at your players.  They are land sharks...LAND SHARKS!
No, no...not that kind of Land Shark.  But equally cool.  It's a giant monster that just eats.  And the best part is that its stomach acid destroys all their gear if they are swallowed whole.  Also, even more fun is the bizarre twist that they won't eat elves and dislike the taste of dwarves.  Nothing is really explained about it...they just say in the manual that they won't eat elves.

Chaos Beast

 *insert evil laughter here*  This monster is so freakin' sweet.  Not only is it nightmare fuel in appearance, but it totally messes with the players.  It's Corporeal Instability ability is one of my favorites.  It basically turns your players into an amorphous blobs if they keep failing their Fort saves.  I also love the quote: "How many different attacks can a creature capable of any form have?  In this case, only two."  Always makes me laugh a little. 


Okay, I'll admit I'm cheating here by using the picture from the Pathfinder Bestiary.  But dear Odin, the picture from the 3.5 Monster Manual is just so awful.  The Balor is supposed to be this horrible, powerful demon that can wipe out all but the most powerful and well-prepared parties, and the picture is just pitifully bad.  The Pathfinder picture is so much cooler.

Anyway, where to begin?  Not only one of the most powerful monsters in the book, but it's also one of the coolest.  I like to save them for a nice end of campaign big boss.  They have extremely powerful stats and some really bad-ass weapons to use against your party.  All that and they can summon up all kinds of other demons, or even another Balor to aid it in combat.  I really do enjoy these guys.


 Ah, the Succubus.  I mostly enjoy using them in non-combat ways.  My favorite method is to have them shapechange into looking like an innocent maiden who is captured in the dungeon.  After the party agrees to help her, she begins to seduce and cajole her way into the party and picking people off one by one.  If caught, she can just run away and either just leave it at that or try again another time.  Always classy, always fun.

Pazuzu, Pazuzu, Pazuzu!  Heh heh.  Anyway, the Vrock.  Ain't no party like a Vrock party cause the Vrock party don't stop.   They can fly, they release spores that automatically damage anyone next to them, then burrow into the skin and grow and they dance.  Oh how they dance...
Hey, Dance Magic Dance!
Okay, not that kind of dance magic...but the their Dance of Ruin does a whole lot of damage to any non-demon (Psssst...that's going to be your party). 

Tyrannosaurus Rex

 I couldn't resist using the Jurassic Park picture.  I love the Tyrannosaurus.  It's huge and swallows players whole.  I mean, for as much as I love these guys, there isn't much I have to say...other then this:

Frost Worm

Oh, I have so many stories about the Frost Worm.  My favorite being that one time that my DM threw three of them against our party.  This led to us killing them, but they have one of my favorite abilities, Death Throes.  And one Frost Worms death throes killed another, whose death throes killed the last one as well, which triggered another death throe.  The damage from those things deaths alone would have completed destroyed my character (he was an illusionist wizard).  I've used them and it's always fun to watch the party whittle it's life down, just waiting for the death throe to trigger.  It's like an awesome DM countdown to fun.

Gibbering Mouther

I'm a big fan of H.P. Lovecraft.  I really enjoy his stories and the universe he created full of giant aliens and unspeakable horror.  These things have a great Lovecraft feel, and I love using them to that effect.  It is a lot of fun to have your party wandering through a dank dungeon, then suddenly have them hear the whispering voices of the Gibbering Mouther in the distance.  Insanity is fun and easy for the party!


The Lich is another one of those monsters that are fun to use as an end-game boss.  Powerful mages and undead my favorite part is that once you kill them, the fun isn't over!  They'll simply come back after enough time and go after the party again.  I love recurring villians and that is the best part.  They can just keep coming back over and over again, each time more powerful then the last.  Liches are the gift that keeps on giving all year round.


 Oh the wonderful brain eating power of the Mindflayer.  I would use these monsters for no reason other then their tactics step 4.  What is step four you ask?  EAT BRAINS.  I'm going to just gloss over the fact that I'm pretty sure this is the only monster that has round by round tactics, like it was some sort of editing mistake they forgot to correct.  It doesn't matter, cause it's tactics include eating brains.  They are like zombies, but way cooler.  Again, maybe I'm a little biased because of the Cthulhu mythos feel, but damn I love the Mindflayers.

I have more, but I'm going to split it into another entry tomorrow.  So come back tomorrow and you'll see the rest of my list of monsters that I'll use until my players lynch me.


  1. Ahem, it was only two Frost Worms. The party killed one, it exploded and killed the other which exploded. Three would have been an easy TPK (60d6 WTFPWNBBQ!!!11!!). Cool write up, so I should be expected some Lich or Balor soon in your game I take it, heh.

  2. Oh yes...possibly a Lich Balor...bwahahahahahahaha!

  3. Great writing! Always entertaining and good for a laugh...ah, the fun memories of D&D games gone by. Thanks for letting everyone know you posted these, as I don't often frequent websites. You know...MMO's sucking out my soul through my eyes. -StarFire